Tuesday, February 22, 2011

It's been awhile...

My life lately has looked alot like this (mid-terms next week).



My house (which I hate <-- long story) is looking like this.



I haven't been cooking much because, well no time. My little Mercedes needs a haircut so bad, she can barely see. I'm such a mess lately :(

Things that are important to me:
1. Have kids soon (medically important)
2. Raise my children (no daycare)
3. Do something I love (i.e. cakes)
4. Finish school (3 more classes!)
5. BE HAPPY!

Every single thing on my list seems unattainable. I'm unhappy with Mr. P lately. I want my own place. He had the house before me and it's become such a burden for both of us. It's too big to keep clean, the yard is too big to manage and the mortgage is too expensive. Everyday I come home, I'm reminded of how unhappy I am with my life and goals. I'm working on school and almost finished. Everything else is way off in the distant future.

Mr P and I are on such rocky ground lately because of the house. He's so focused on the house, I've been feeling like I'm off on my own. I told him to pay more attention but he said he has too much going on. I'm at the fork in the road again. Do I wait it out and hope things get better or just go and make things happen for myself ? 

3 comments:

  1. lol, I liked the photo in your post. A fork in the road, I get it! lol
    Keeping things clean and your to-do list done takes willpower and you have to force yourself to do it even when you feel like doing nothing but sitting down and having a coffee while watching a movie.
    A way you could get your kids involved is to write up a list with specific duties for each person (including you) so that on your "cleaning day" everyone has their own chores and responsibilities. Afterwards celebrating with a special treat like going and renting a movie or getting your kid's favorite foods will be both a reward for them and for yourself.
    Keep the mood positive and energetic in the midst of your crazy, busy life, and you'll find that after your necessary duties (work, feeding and taking care of kids and hubby, etc), keeping your house cleaned and organized will greatly improve the mood and you won't have that guilt and a "to-do" list hanging over your head. :)

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  2. the literal fork in the road picture is very neat...i have to say that i love how honest you are on here. i enjoy reading about it-but the white lettering on the light pink background is really difficult to see..or maybe it's just my computer.

    what you are doing-going to school, persuing your cake making dreams, etc-are things to be proud of. i hope you can see how awesome that is. as far as mr. p and you-that clearly will impact the children part and even the house part. maybe you will need and want this house if there are little ones to fill it? it won't seem so big this way?

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  3. Sorry your having just a rough time. Try to take a step back and look at the big picture.

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