It's odd, yesterday I was talking weddings and babies and today I'm rethinking everything. I can write my thoughts on here, but actually sharing them out loud, not sure. Yesterday Mr. P got off work early! Score, time to spend some quality time together right? WRONG! First he asked his friend to come over and help us return some stuff we bought to Lowe's because it wouldn't all fit in either of our cars, ok no big deal. Well it's 6:30 and his friend comes over and still no Mr. P. An hour later he finally shows up and it takes us an hour to return the stuff and get some food. We get home after 9 and he might as well have worked all night. Turns out he stopped to talk to someone about a job, but still...Lately it just feels, that I care so much more :(
I've been married and my favorite thing about my husband was how he always felt (and showed) how lucky he was to be with me. I don't get that feeling from Mr. P. Instead, it's like how lucky should I feel that I'm with him. I know you shouldn't keep score or anything to that nature. I guess I don't feel very appreciated lately.... I don't know if I'm just noticing it, or it's the puppy. I've equated having that puppy to having a baby and Mr. P sees absolutely no resemblance whatsoever.
Last night, Mercedes had to go potty at about 6am. Mr. P has today off, why wouldn't he just get up and let her out. Instead, he ignored her until I got up and let her out. Then this morning when I got ready for work, I put the puppy on the floor and he told me to take her out because she probably had to go potty. I'm trying to get dressed, do my hair, eat breakfast etc. and he's awake and can't let the dog out?
One of my close friends asked me recently if I thought Mr. P was the right guy for me, I immediately said yes, then asked why? As I sat and pondered on it. That was when I realized I don't know and that doesn't make me a bad person. We've only been together for 1.5 years. Sometimes it takes awhile to know. There are certain things about it that I can't stand, but that make me love him more. For example, his impulsiveness. He all of a sudden decided he was going to sell his car to get a truck, just like that and started calling people he knows to find out if anyone wanted to buy it. Every choice I make has to be thought out and that's something I would plan. Getting the puppy was his idea on a rainy Saturday afternoon on his lunch hour at work. We went 4 places within 1.5 hours and found Mercedes, bought her and took her home. Those decisions for me usually would take a couple days.
When I ask him how we end up together and can be so different his answer is "Opposites Attract". I read a book a week (at least!), while he can't get past the first page. I have a major sweet tooth, he eats ice cream maybe twice a month. I prefer chicken, he loves steak. I plan my life out to the "T", he lives life as it comes.Don't get me wrong, we've lasted this long we have to have somethings in common. We both love dogs, movies and being at home. We love watching HGTV together. I watch wrestling with him, he watches cooking shows with me. Is that enough to sustain a relationship on? I don't know. I really don't.